160+ Ghost Puns & Jokes

Funny Ghost Puns

1. The ghost said to the supermodel ‘if you’ve got it, haunt it’.
2. The comedian ghost had everyone in stitches – he was dead funny.
3. When the ghost family got in their car the dad told the kids to fasten their sheet-belts.
4. Ghosts are terrible liars because you can see right through them.
5. The most useless room in a ghost’s home in the living room.
6. The ghost was told off when he spook out of turn.
7. The ghoul didn’t get his letter on time because it got lost at the ghost office.
8. A boy ghost thought a girl ghost was cute so he asked if she would be his ghoul-friend.
9. The best place for a ghost to go on holiday is The Dead Sea.
10. The ghost had to turn her car around because she reached a dead end.
11. Ghosts drop off their babies at the day-scare centre when they go to work.

Boo Puns

1. When the ghost saw his wife he said ‘you’re not just cute, you’re boo-tiful too!’
2. When the ghost blew his nose, lots of boo-gers came out.
3. When the ghost watched a sad movie he started boo-hooing.
4. Panda ghosts love to eat bam-boo.
5. If you see a ghost you should always say ‘how do you boo?’
6. When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
7. I feel like I have seen that ghost before…I must have deja boo.
8. The pirate ghost was searching for boo-ty.
9. When they want to relax, ghosts have a boo-ble bath.
10. When it’s time to wash their hair, ghosts always use sham-boo.
11. To know if ghosts think you are a good singer or not, you have to listen for any boos.
12. Two ghosts were at a disco. One was having a fa-boo-lous time and the other wanted to boo-gie all night long!

Ghostly Food Puns

1. A ghost’s favourite pie flavour is boo-berry.
2. At the Italian restaurant, the ghoul ordered spook-ghetti for his main course.
3. When ghosts visit the seaside, they always get an i-scream.
4. Ghosts always love to eat breakfast in the moaning.
5. When a ghoul makes a roast dinner, he always smothers it in grave-y.
6. For dessert, the ghost made a delicious boo-meringue.
7. I found out yesterday that the Mexican dish ghosts like the most is a boo-rito.
8. The ghost wanted to make a cake but had run out of flour so she had to pop to the ghostery store to buy some more.

Halloween Puns

1. Trick or treat yo’ self.
2. Orange you excited for Halloween?
3. Give ’em pumpkin to talk about.
4. Creep it real.
5. Hello, gourd-geous.
6. Eat, drink, and be scary.
7. Life is gourd.
8. Lift your spirits!
9. Mummy of the year.
10. Happy Howl-oween.
11. Too cute to spook.
12. Howl you doin’?
13. Oh my gourd!
14. Trick or tequila.
15. #SquashGoals
16. Come as you aren’t.
17. A scare is born.
18. Hallow-queen.
19. Frankly, I don’t think I’m that scary.
20. Don’t be a jerk-o-lantern.
21. Feeling gourd, like I should.
22. Looking for a bunny costume because it’s hoppy hour.
23. You’re the pick of the patch.
24. The zombie thinks this is the best thing since sliced head.
25. My costume is eerie-sistible.
26. Goblin candy all night.

Witch Puns

1. What did Dracula say when the witch and the warlock started kissing? Get a broom!
2. Witch, please.
3. Basic witch.
4. If the broom fits, fly it.
5. Resting witch face.
6. Witchful thinking.
7. Witch and famous.
8. What’s up my witches?
9. You say witch like it’s a bad thing.
10. Bow down, witches.
11. Witch upon a star.
12. Witch better have my candy.
13. Keep calm and carry a wand.
14. You’ve got me under your spell.
15. Grab your broomstick so we can make a clean getaway.
16. Witching you a happy Halloween.

Skeleton Puns

1. Lazy bones.
2. Bone to be wild.
3. Laughing ’til I’m coffin.
4. Some people have no guts.
5. Bugs and hisses.
6. Do you play the trom-bone?
7. Dying to have fun.
8. Bone appetit!
9. You can’t skele-run from my skele-puns.
10. I would make a skeleton joke, but you wouldn’t find it very humerus.
11. Let’s have some skele-fun.
12. Spine on the dotted line.
13. No body won the skeleton race.
14. Where does a skeleton go for a fun night? Anywhere, as long as it’s a hip joint.
15. I’m bad to the bone.

Ghost Puns

1. The ghostess with the mostest.
2. Ghouls just want to have fun
3. Why did the ghost cross the road? Because it was a poultry-geist.
4. I’m here for the boos.
5. Shake your boo-ty!
6. If you’ve got it, haunt it.
7. #Squadghouls
8. Haunting my exes.
9. Hey boo-tiful.
10. Where my ghouls at?
11. Boo Felicia.
12. Just hanging out with my ghoul friends.
13. More boos, please.
14. Demons are a ghoul’s best friend.
15. Hey boo, let’s get sheet-faced.
16. Romeo and Ghouliet.
17. Boo-yah!
18. Fa-boo-lous!
19. Have an eek-tastic Halloween!
20. I go to the bars for boos.
21. Fasten your sheet belts!
22. I think I have deja-boo.
23. Demons are a ghouls best friend.
24. Looking fa-boo-lous.

Vampire Puns

1. Love at first bite.
2. Fangs for the memories.
3. I’m a pain in the neck.
4. So long, sucker.
5. It’s in my blood.
6. You make me batty.
7. I have an account at the blood bank.
8. Have a fang-tastic Halloween.
9. You’re just my (blood) type.
10. Getting kissed by a vampire is a pain in the neck.
11. I know some vampire puns, but they all suck.
12. I’m looking for my necks victim.
13. Join my fang club!
14. Vampires hate peaches, but they love neck-tarines.
15. You can Count on me.
16. Sucks to be me.
17. You’re just my (blood) type.

Ghost Jokes

• Why are Ghosts in such good shape?

Plenty of exorcise and a good die-t.

• How does a Ghost say good-bye?

I can’t wait to seance you again.

• What sound do you hear if you explode a Ghost?

kaBOOm!

• Which is a Ghost’s favourite cheese?

Ghoul-da Cheese.

• What do Ghosts say when they are impressed?

That was spectre-cular!

• Which soccer position does a Ghost play?

Ghoulkeeper, of course.

• What is a Ghost’s favourite treat?

Ice-scream floats.

• Where do Ghosts travel to for a holiday?

South Aarghfricaargh.

• Where is the Ghost’s bedroom located?

Down the Hall-oween.

• Is Casper a boy or a girl?

Casper is a Ghoul.

• Why do Ghosts make such good company?

They are full of spirit.

• A Ghost walks into a bar.

He did not notice.

• Why did the Ghost turn down the job?

He could not see himself doing it.

• How should you greet a Ghost?

Long time, no see.

• Why are Ghosts so lonely?

They have nobody to lean on.

• Why did the Ghost make such a good host?

She was the Ghostest with the mostest.

• What do Ghosts eat on a Sunday?

Ghost Chicken and grave-y.

• What does the Ghost say when he sneezes?

Ach-ooooooooooooooooooooo!

• What do Ghost children play?

Hide and shriek!

• What is a Ghost’s favourite toy to play with?

Leg-oooooooooooooooo!

• What is the collective noun for Ghosts?

Team spirit.

• What is Ghost’s favourite element?

Boo-ron

• What do Ghosts suffer from?

Saturday fright fever.

• What is a Ghost’s favourite film?

Paranormal Activity.

• What do Ghost’s say when they are disappointed?

I am Peeves-d off!

• What do Ghost’s list themselves as for tax purposes?

Soul-trader.

• When is a Ghost’s favourite time of day?

Mourning time.

• Which car is a Ghost’s favourite?

It is between a Boogatti or a Rolls-Royce Phantom.

• I just found out my Husband is a Ghost.

I realised the moment he walked through the door.

• Why do Ghost’s make terrible liars.

They fall right through the bed.

• Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match?

They scored more Ghouls.

• What you call the Ghost of a Chicken?

Poultry-geist.

• Why do Ghosts avoid the rain?

It dampens their spirits.

• Who serves Coffee at a Starbucks?

Boo-ristas.

• What is a Ghost’s favourite Pizza?

Tomb-ato and cheese.