200+ Penguin Puns & Jokes

Funny Penguin Puns

1. The baby penguin was excited to meet his favourite aunt Artica.
2. Before the baseball match, the penguins decided to flipper coin.
3. The penguin hacked into the online security system using his webbed feet.
4. The momma penguin was making pancakes for breakfast. She flipped the pancake with ease.
5. The teenage penguin was excited about the dance. It was her first snow-ball.
6. Papa penguin went shopping for some groceries. He asked the shopkeeper to put the items on his bill.
7. The penguin passed his driving test by sheer luck. He winged it!
8. The penguin decided to go to the beach. He wore an ice cap.
9. The penguins decided to construct a new house for their family. All the family members iglooed it together.
10. The baby penguin was sick. The penguin doctors had no igloo what was wrong with him.
11. A poor penguin lost his eye in an accident. People now call him pengun.
12. Everyone loved the penguin who lived in the neighbourhood. He’s an ice guy, they say.
13. The penguin decided to wear his new flipper flops to the beach.
14. The receptionist at the doctor’s said, “pen-go-in; it’s your turn now.”
15. The maths teacher at the penguin school asked the students to pract-ice more.
16. The baby penguin thanked his mother for helping him out with his homework and said, “Waddle I do without you, maa.”

Cute Penguin Puns

1. The baby penguins were playing their favorite game, ping ponguin.
2. The commentator announced the winner of the Annual Day race. It was a peng-win.
3. A group of Emperor penguins went to watch a play; it was called ‘Julius Freezer.’
4. A penguin got separated from his herd. He felt very ice-olated.
5. The old penguin said, “I think migrate regret in life is that I never learned how to fly.”
6. A penguin was stopped at an airport by the security staff. The security officer said, “penguins can’t fly.”
7. “Hey, peng-when are you going to let me in, it’s cold outside,” said the penguin’s neighbour.
8. The penguin groom started jumping up and down on the ice sheet because he got cold feet.
9. The penguin could always sense if something was wrong in any situation. He could smell something fishy.
10. Penguins are the life of any party. They know how to break the ice.
11. The group of penguins decided to go out for a swim. They went to the south pool.
12. The baby penguin thanked his mother for the homemade ice berg-ers.
13. The suspect penguin was released on bail because the judge said he was not a flight risk.
14. The baby penguin received a present for Christmas, he got a nice pair of blubber gloves.
15. On the occasion of their marriage anniversary, to express his love and gratitude for his wife, the penguin said, “Waddle I do without you? Thanks for always being there for me.”
16. Penguins avoid going to Great Britain because they are afraid of Wales.
17. The jolly penguin used to grin all the time; people called him pengrin.
18. The writer pen-guin quickly jotted down some ideas; an exciting plot point had struck his mind.
19. The penguin got stuck at the billing counter in the supermarket.
20. A group of penguins were seen bouncing on the floor. They were trying to break the ice.
21. Momma penguin was angry at the baby penguins for not listening to her. She flippered out.
22. The penguin had to pay the fine; the cops said he was found gawking at random strangers.
23. The penguin won the car race. He is always in pole position.
24. The penguin car racer egg-celerated the car, and everything escalated very quickly.
25. The penguins were so thirsty that they were drinking water directly out of the beak-ers.
26. “Freeze a jolly good fellow,” the penguins started singing for the birthday boy.
27. After a long day, all the worker penguins huddled home.
28. Every morning, the baby penguin travelled to school by icicle with his elder brother.
29. The penguin workers billed up a long, steady bridge to get to the other side of the island.
30. The baby penguins at the kindergarten were playing their favorite game, rock-hopper-scissor.
31. The penguin bought a cool looking ice cap to match his funky dance costume for the dance competition.
32. As the magician penguin was showing off some of his magic tricks, he asked a volunteer to pick a cod, any cod of his choice.
33. The penguin refused to enter the lift; she was feeling claw-strophobic.
34. The teenage penguin’s favorite video game is the Gentoo Pokémon.
35. The celebrity penguin’s Met Gala-pogus outfit was so on fleek. She stole the show.
36. The salesgirl at the showroom asked the penguin if she would like to try something else, “I would like to try a chinstrap,” replied the penguin.
37. The eye specialist advised the penguin to wear spectacles to help his ice-sight.
38. The penguins were listening to their favorite pop song, ‘Bill-eiver.’
39. A group of penguins went to the club to play a game of bill-iards.

Penguin One-Liners And Funny Greeting Card Captions

1. When in doubt, wing it out.
2. Keep calm and keep waddling.
3. Huddling up with my buddies.
4. Keep waddling and go with the floe.

Penguin Jokes And Puns That Are Brrrr-illiantly Funny

• Where do penguins keep their money?

In a snow bank, of course!

• What do you call a happy penguin?

A pen-grin!

• So why don’t penguins like rock music?

They only like sole.

• What do penguins like to wear on the beach?

A beak-ini.

• How do you get in touch with a penguin?

Give him a wing.

• How does a group of penguins make a difficult decision?

Flipper coin.

• Why did the penguin cross the road?

To go with the floe.

• What do penguins eat for lunch?

Ice-burgers.

• What do you give to a penguin that’s ill?

Some medical tweetment.

• Where do penguins go to watch movies?

At the dive-in.

• What do you call a cold penguin?

A brrr-d.

• What does a penguin do when it loses its tail?

It goes to a re-tail store.

• What is a penguin’s favorite family member?

Aunt Artica!

• Who is the head of the penguin Navy?

Admiral Byrd.

• Why did the two penguins jump when they first met?

hey were trying to break the ice.

• What would you call a penguin with no I?

Pengun.

• Where do penguins go dancing?

The Snow Ball.

• Why would a penguin cross the road twice?

To prove he isn’t a chicken.

• What does a penguin eat on its birthday?

Fish cakes!

• Why are penguins good race car drivers?

They are always in pole position.

• Why are penguins so difficult to get along with?

Because they’re always fishing for compliments.

• How does a penguin build a LEGO house?

Igloos it together!

• What do you call a penguin in the desert?

Lost!

• How do penguins drink their Coca-Cola?

On the rocks.

• What’s black and white and goes round and round?

A penguin in a revolving door.

• Why do two penguins in a nest always agree?

Because they don’t want to fall out.

• What do penguins wear on their head?

Ice caps.

• What is a penguin’s favorite Mexican food?

Brrrrrr-itos.

• Who is a penguin’s favorite pop star?

Seal.

• What’s black, white, black, white, black, white, black, white?

A penguin rolling down a hill.

• What do penguins catch at night?

Starfish.

• What do penguins sing on a birthday?

“Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.”

• A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a penguin sitting next to him.“Are you a penguin?” asks the man, surprised. “Yes,” says the penguin. “What are you doing at the movies?” he asks. “Well,” replies the penguin, “I really liked the book.”
• Why shouldn’t you write a book on penguins?

Because writing a book on paper is much easier!

• When I meet new people, I always talk about my giant pet penguin…

It’s a good icebreaker.

• Why do polar bears and penguins not get along?

Because they are polar opposites.

• Why don’t you ever see penguins in Great Britain?

Because they’re scared of Wales!

• Why didn’t the penguin jump off the iceberg?

He got cold feet.

• Why don’t penguins fly?

Because they’re not tall enough to be pilots.

• How did the penguin pass its driving test?

It winged it!

• Why do penguins wear glasses?

To help their ice-sight.

• What do penguins drink in the summer?

Iced tea.

• What is a penguin’s favorite movie?

Frozen.

• What shoes do penguins wear in the summer?

Flipper flops.

• A penguin walks into a bar…

The bartender looks up and says, “Hey, listen, these things don’t fly around here.”

• How does a penguin cook burgers?

With his flippers.

• Why do penguins always carry fish in their beaks?

They don’t have any pockets!

• What do penguins wear on their feet at nighttime?

Slippers.

• What is black and white and red all over?

A sun burnt penguin!

• What are the oldest animals?

Zebras and Penguins because they’re in black and white.

• How do Penguins finish a race?

They pengwin.

• Can a penguin fly?

No, but a toucan.

• When visiting England, what do nuclear scientists penguins eat?

Fission chips.

• What’s a penguin’s favorite pasta?

Penguini.

• What’s a penguin’s favorite place to swim?

The South Pool.

Penguin Related Puns

1. It’s penguining to look a lot like Christmas!
2. Penguini – Penguin’s favorite pasta!
3. Peng-win – When a penguin wins!
4. Pen-grin – When a penguin smiles from ear to ear (hang on… do penguins have ears???) !
5. Peng-queen – Wife of the King Penguin (King is a type of penguin).
6. Aunt-arctic / Aunt-artica – Favorite aunt of a penguin.
7. Dive-in – Where penguins go to watch a movie.
8. When penguins want to make a decision, they often flipper a coin!
9. Frrrr-eeeezz-er (For he’s) jolly good fellow!
10. Iceberg-ers – What penguins order with their coke and fries.
11. Have an ice day.
12. Pract-ice – What penguins do when they want to be the best at something.
13. South Pool – Favorite place for penguins to swim.
14. Waddle I do without you?

Penguin Quotes & One Liners

1. It’s practically impossible to look at a penguin and feel angry ~ Joe Moore
2. I think penguins are the most human of all the birds, which may be why people love them. They’re cute, they stand upright and they look like they’re wearing tuxedos. ~ Shia LaBeouf
3. If ever I need to have back-up dancers, I want the penguins from Madagascar ~ Ed Sheeran
4. A penguin cannot become a giraffe, so just be the best penguin you can be. ~ Gary Vaynerchuk
5. What’s the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. ~ Dave Attell (Note to animal lovers : This is a JOKE)
6. I’ve never been in love, but if a penguin can find a soul mate, I’m sure I can, too. ~
7. Once a penguin finds its perfect other penguin, they stay together pretty much forever. ~ Anna Staniszewski
8. No matter what I do with my life, or how successful I am, I will always be a socially awkward penguin inside. ~ Wil Wheaton
9. I know what nuns are, kind of. It’s just I never saw one. I didn’t know they looked like penguins. ~ Lesley Howarth
10. When you think about things, think about a can opener for penguins. ~ Anthony T. Hincks
11. Penguins mate for life. Which doesn’t really surprise me, because they all look exactly alike. It’s not like they’re gonna meet a better-looking penguin someday.~ Ellen DeGeneres
12. She smiled with the warmth of a penguin. ~ Kim Harrison
13. You should not take prayer too seriously. There is something playful about God. You only have to look at a penguin … to realize that He likes to play little jokes on creatures. ~ Thomas Keating
14. I’ve just finished my book, I wrote it on penguins. Come to think of it, paper would have been better. ~ Milton Jones
15. Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
    A: Because they’re afraid of Wales.
16. Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
    A: A re-tail store.
17. Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
    A: The outside.
18. What do you call a cold penguin?
    A: A Brrr-d.
19. Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
    A: Admiral Byrd.
20. Why are penguins good race drivers?
    A: Because they’re always in the pole position.
21. What does an evil penguin lay?
    A: Deviled eggs.
22. Why did the penguin cross the road?
    A: It was the chicken’s day off.
23. Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
    A: To prove he wasn’t chicken.
24. What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
    A: Put it on my bill.
25. Where do penguins go to dance?
    A: The snow ball.
26. Where does a penguin keep its money?
    A: In a snow bank.
27. How does a penguin make pancakes?
    A: With its flippers.
28. What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
    A: An eggroll.
29. Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
    A: Aunt-Arctica.
30. What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
    A: Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
31. Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
    A: To get to the other tide.
32. How do you get down off an penguin?
    A: You don’t – you get down off a duck.
33. What do penguins wear on their heads?
    A: Ice caps.
34. What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
    A: A penguin rolling down a hill.
35. What do penguins drink during the summer?
    A: Iced tea.
36. What do penguins eat for lunch?
    A: Ice burg-ers.
37. Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
    A: Anywhere it wants.
38. How do penguins drink?
    A: Out of beak-ers.
39. What do you give a sick penguin?
    A: Tweetment.
40. How do penguins make a decision?
    A: Flipper coin.
41. Why don’t penguins fly?
    A: They are not tall enough to be pilots.
42. What does a magician penguin say?
    A: “Pick a cod, any cod…”
43. What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
    A: An egg.
44. What did the sea say to the penguin?
    A: Nothing, it just waved.
45. What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
    A: The Eggs-celerator.
46. Where do penguins go to the movies?
    A: At the dive-in!
47. What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
    A: Iceberg lettuce!
48. What do you call a penguin in the desert?
    A: Lost!
49. Where do penguins go swimming?
    A: At the South Pool!
50. How do Penguins drink their cola?
    A: On the rocks.
51. What do Penguins like to eat?
    A: Brrrrrrrr-itos.
52. Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
    A: Seal.
53. What birds like to write?
    A: Penguins!
54. How does a penguin build its house?
    A: Igloos it together!
55. What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
    A: Starfish.
56. Where do penguins keep their money?
    A: In a snow bank!
57. Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
    A: They only like sole.
58. What do you call a happy penguin?
    A: a Pen-Grin!
59. What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
    A: Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
60. What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
    A: Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
61. How do you get in touch with a penguin?
    A: Give him a wing.
62. Why did the two penguins jump when they first met?
    A: They were trying to break the ice.
63. What would you call a penguin with no I?
    A: Pengun.
64. Where do penguins go dancing?
    A: The Snow Ball.
65. What does a penguin eat on its birthday?
    A: Fish cakes!
66. Why are penguins so difficult to get along with?
    A: Because they’re always fishing for compliments.
67. What’s black and white and goes round-and-round?
    A: A penguin in a revolving door.
68. Why do two penguins in a nest always agree?
    A: Because they don’t want to fall out.
69. Why shouldn’t you write a book on penguins?
    A: Because writing a book on paper is much easier!
70. When I meet new people, I always talk about my giant pet penguin…
    A: It’s a good icebreaker.
71. What is a penguin’s favorite movie?
    A: Frozen.
72. Why was the penguin popular
    A: Because he was an ice guy.
73. Why was the penguin late to his own wedding?
    A: He had cold feet.