120+ Tennis Puns & Jokes

Tennis Puns & Jokes

1. Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception?

Because that was a terrible call.

2. The walls in this tennis factory are so thin, that when I try to get some work done, all I hear is people making a racquet.
3. Do you always play this badly at the net?

Because I don’t like your approach.

4. Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes.

I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.

5. Did you see the guy with quad-arms play tennis?

He has a great four-hand.

6. Pick-up line: You might as well play be a tennis player, because I’m about to court you girl.
7. American Indians used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes.

They called it the A Tee Pee Tour.

8. Oh, I thought I was playing the first round, but I guess I got a free pass.
9. Is there a bathroom in this tennis club?

Because I’m about to drop a deuce.

10. I know my shot was in.

But I won’t argue, because I’m not up for the challenge.

11. An orange and an apple signed up for a tournament.

No one was surprised to find out they were both seeded.

12. I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls.

When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.

13. The guy missed both his serves on match point.

I won by de-fault.

14. Both tournament directors published the schedule at the same time.

It was a draw.

15. You can never get short balls over the net!

Solution: Drop shot from arsenal.

16. Too bad my serve hit the tape.

Well, at least they’ll LET me hit it again.

17. Federer is such a legend that they named the Roger’s Cup, and Fed Cup after him.
18. Tennis is a lot like waiting tables.

The most important thing to get right is the first serve.

19. I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
20. I tried to hit the picture cleanly over the fence, but it was framed.
21. Why can’t I ever win a game returning serve?

Give me a break.

22. I have one animal in my farm who I look up to more than Federer: GOAT.
23. I like my breakfast like my tennis grip: Continental.
24. I really hate these strings.

I can feel it in my gut.

25. Does this guy work with computers?

He looks like a hacker.

26. The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
27. Two birds played a tennis match.

Ironically, the one that made the worst calls was a Hawk….aye!

28. I want to practice my forehand outside, but it will be wet in the morning and nice later on.

So here’s the plan for today: inside-out.

29. I’d like to throw away my old can, but my pusher friend here says he loves junk balls.
30. Mary didn’t miss a first serve the entire match.

It was not her fault she lost.

31. My friend Elmer’s has gotten really good at tennis ever since he stuck to a healthier diet and went glue-ten free.
32. What time should I book the court?

Let’s shoot for around tennish.

33. I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air.

I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.

34. I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
35. The last thing I can remember was the yellow ball speeding toward me.

I swung the racquet, and then things got fuzzy.

36. I’m a baseliner and I don’t know how to volley: my game would disappear if I went to no-man’s land.
37. A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
38. A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate.

He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.

39. I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
40. I got so mad at my partner hitting moonballs, I had to pusher off the court.
41. They call me Ace, because you just got served.
42. Is it ad-out again?

I’m going to hit my breaking point.

43. Ana hits a lot of floating shots that her opponents destroy for winners.

We need to sitter down and have a talk.

44. I am disappointed that you are taking such a closed-stance on my footwork advice.
45. If you want to impress the crowd, hit overheads.

Every point will be a smash hit.

46. Two racquets started dating. Unfortunately, one was stringing the other along without any intention of tying the knot.
47. Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding.

Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.

48. The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
49. The injured player wanted to congratulate the winner, but he couldn’t walkover to the other side of the court.
50. Most of your players never make it out of the lower-level tournaments.

I highly doubt their Futures as a professional.

51. It feels great to hit the ball again.

It spin a long time.

Best Tennis Puns

1. The retired tennis player didn’t make a great waiter because he kept saying “You Got Served!”
2. The man with four hands is a great tennis player because of his four-hand.
3. Players at the local tennis club were unable to surf the web because there were problems with the server.
4. My neighbor hates tennis because he says it makes too much racquet.
5. The indoor tennis facility was famous for serving bubble tea.
6. Tennis players often marry for the money because love doesn’t means anything to them.
7. The ghost loved tennis, he especially loved playing the game on the tennis corpse!
8. The tennis player was not allowed to take out books at the library about aces because he never returned them.
9. I just bought a second-hand tennis racquet for just $5 with no strings attached.
10. The tennis player needed to go to anger management classes because he kept reaching his breaking point.
11. A young tennis player has to be home in bed by around ten-nish in order to become a better player.
12. The tennis player always had bad cellphone reception at the stadium due to a bad call.
13. The amateur tennis player was really bat at the net, the coach blamed it on his approach.
14. The tennis player never was able to get dates because of all of the backhanded compliments.
15. She told the judge Shank-You, after she framed the ball for a winner.
16. It was no surprise to anyone that the strawberry and the apple seeded very well in the tennis tournament.
17. Tennis scoring will never change because it has been around for decades and set in those ways.
18. The tennis pro enjoyed his breakfast and tennis grip continental.
19. Billy got the nickname Ace because he kept getting served.
20. She broke up with the tennis player because she felt he was just stringing her along.
21. A tennis ball can be served but should not be eaten.
22. The girl standing in the center of the tennis court was nicknamed Annette.
23. Fish hate playing tennis because they will not go anywhere near the net.
24. Never start dating tennis players because of the fact that love means absolutely nothing to them.
25. Tennis players make difficult customers in restaurants because they keep returning everything.
26. The two tennis players decided that their first date would be at the tennis ball.
27. When little Johnny was asked what comes before tennis, he simply answered nine-ish.
28. The best way to tell if your tennis instructor does not like your serve is if they keep returning it.
29. It was very dark inside the tennis players how because he refused to admit the light-bulbs were out.
30. Tennis players hope to eventually retire in Volley-wood.
31. The reason that tennis matches can take forever to play is because the lines are so long.
32. Most tennis players admit that they have low self-esteem due to the fact they have many faults.
33. The only tennis tournament that never closes is the OPEN.
34. My friend Evelyn tells me that the state with the most tennis players is Tennis-see.
35. The tennis coach and the dentist became good friends because they both worked with drills.
36. It is not a good idea to play tennis in a court because you could get arrested.
37. A horse’s favorite sport is of course stable tennis.
38. Players love tennis because even though you live just once, you are able to serve twice.
39. The tennis player was fired from the team because he was always getting smashed after the matches.
40. The prank caller wanted to be a tennis referee because he was always making terrible calls.
41. The young tennis player would not date anyone because she didn’t like their approach.
42. Terrible Tommy was the worst tennis player and was nicknamed cream cheese because he kept getting bageled.
43. When the two tennis matches were scheduled simultaneously, it was considered a draw.
44. Elmo has gotten better at tennis since he decided to stick to a healthy diet that was glue-ten free.
45. The tennis player wasn’t good at persuading other tennis players, so she hired a lob-byist.
46. Roger Federer keeps getting drunk in the club because all of the shots are on the baseline.
47. Do you know why dogs are so good at playing tennis? – Because they have strong four-hand.

Funny Tennis Puns

1. Don’t be a deuce.
2. I’m in love when I beat you
3. You just got served
4. It spin a long time
5. You make quite the racquet
6. That felt like a backhanded compliment
7. Orange and Apple are playing today which is no surprise since they are both seeded
8. Have you seen my balls?
9. Kiss my ace
10. Tennis anyone?
11. Baby got back hand

Other Tennis Puns

1. You can score all the points tonight, I’ll be in love
2. I’m read to see some doubles
3. Why are dogs good at tennis? They have great four-hand
4. If you want a soft serve, go to Dairy Queen
5. If you can return my serve, I’ll return your call
6. Annette is always in my way when I serve
7. Hey, let’s squash it right now!
8. Do you always play this poorly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach
9. Tennis starts with love
10. Are you in computer software because you seem like a hacker