Best Bat Puns
- The first thing bats learn in school is the alphabat.
- If you cross a vampire bat and a computer, you will end up with love at first byte.
- The most a bat lands in belfry, it changes its identity to a dingbat.
- The main reason why vampire bats drink lots of blood is because any attempt at coffee keeps them awake the entire night.
- Girl vampires have a very interesting way of flirting. They bat their eyes.
- In the animal kingdom, bats are the only skilled in playing baseball.
- Have you ever discovered that all vampire bats have false teeth? The reason is, they come out at night.
- The bat was so angry and said to the vampire, “you really suck.”
- There are many ways of holding a bat, but the best is by the handle.
- When you cross a vampire with an ice cube, you end up with a frost bite.
- Most softball games are played at night because the bats have to sleep during the day.
- When you cross a lonely hearts club and a bat, you will end up with lots of blind dates.
- There is a lot of activities that bats engage in at night, but the most prominent is aerobatics.
- The correct name for a little bat though not endorsed in the world’s leading dictionaries is a battle.
- Vampires regularly use mouthwash because they have such bat breath.
- Bats are spendthrifts, they keep most of their money in blood banks.
- There is no friendship greater than that of bats. They always hang around together.
- A vampire bat enters his house through the bat flap.
- School going vampires carry their books in bat packs.
- When baking cakes, vampires use batter.
- The mom to the naughty vampire said to him, “Watch your battitude, that is not how you talk to your elders.”
- Vampires have a special newspaper where their obatuaries are printed when they die.
- Vampires are seasoned baseball players, they practice in batting cages.
- When you cross a cow and a vampire, you end up with a hamburger that bites back.
- The witches team lost their opening baseball game because all their bats flew away.
- Vampires rarely take a shower, but when they do, they have a special bat room reserved for them.
- The favorite keep fit game for Draculas is batminton.
- All the little witches loved playing bats cradle at school.
- Though they fly at night, bats do not bump into anything. They have wing mirrors to coordinate their flights.
- Casketball has been listed as one of the sports registering huge populations of bats.
- When the geeky bat cracked the code, everyone couldn’t help but congratulate them for being such bloody brilliant.
- Bat counselors only have one advice for their clients. Just hang in there.
- The greatest movie ever produced incorporating vampire actors is the bat-tle of the blood bath.
- After missing a day of school, the bat said to his best friend, “Welcome bat, you haven’t missed a lot.”
- The markets that bats avoid at all cost is the flea markets.
- When the little dog saw the huge bat hanging at the balcony, it came in so terrier-fied.
- Little bats are fond of drinking the alpha-bat soup.
- When bats lose their tails, they go to a re-tail store.
- Robin got kicked off the baseball team because he forgot his bat, man!
- After taking a shower, a vampire stands on a bat mat.
- A bat can easily make new friends with a sound wave.
- What is the most favourite fruit of bats? – It must be neck-tarines!
- A young bat can experience a lot of things in life by hanging out.
Bat Jokes

- Two bats were hanging upside down in a cave. The first bat asks the second, “Do you remember the worst day of your life?” “I sure do,” said the second bat. “It was the day I had diarrhea.”
- I keep a bat in my bedroom for protection.
It makes me feel safe but it also keeps pooping in my ear.
- A group of bats, hanging at the ceiling of a cave, discovers a single bat standing upright underneath on the floor of the cave. Surprised by this unusual behavior, they ask this fellow: “What the heck are you doing down there?” And the fellow shouts back: “Yoga!”
- I made a bat joke.
It went viral.
- What’s a bat’s favorite holiday?
Fangs-giving.
- What’s the difference between Batman and a shoplifter?
Batman can go into a store without Robin.
- What did Batman do when he went shopping?
Got ham.
- What does Batman put in his drinks?
Just ice.
- What position did Bruce Wayne play on his baseball team?
He was the bat boy.
- My girlfriend said I’m starting to annoy her because I relate everything to Batman.
What a Joker!
- What does Batman do when he’s losing at cards?
He uses his Joker.
- What is the first thing bats learn in school?
The alphabat.
- What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
- What do you get when you cross a vampire with an ice cube?
You end up with frost bite.
- Why are most softball games are played at night?
Because the bats have to sleep during the day.
- What happens when you cross a lonely hearts club and a bat?
You end up with lots of blind dates.
- There are a lot of activities that bats engage in at night, but the most prominent is aerobatics.
- How does a vampire bat enter his house?
Through the bat flap.
- Where do school-going vampires carry their books?
In bat-packs.
- What do vampires use when baking cakes?
Batter.

- Why did the witches team lose their opening baseball game?
Because all their bats flew away.
- What advice do bat counselors give to their clients?
“Just hang in there.”
- What did the bat say to his best friend after missing a day of school?
“Welcome bat, you haven’t missed a lot.”
- What markets do bats avoid at all costs?
Flea markets.
- What are little bats fond of drinking?
Alpha-bat soup.
- Where do bats go when they lose their tails?
They go to a re-tail store.
- What does a vampire do after taking a shower?
It stands on a bat mat.
- How do bats make new friends?
With a sound wave.
- What makes it OK for bats to just poop wherever they want?
For a bat, every room is the bat-room.
- What did the rat say when he saw a bat?
“Oh my! I just saw an angel!”
- Robin: “Batman, Batman, there is a problem with the Batmobile, it does not start.”
Batman: “Must be the battery.” Robin: “What is a tery?”
- Me: “Dad I have bats in my attic.”
Dad: “Baseball or softball?”
- Where do bats go to learn things?
To night school.
- What did the bat do when he didn’t know the answer to the teacher’s question?
He winged it.
- How do bats do the register at school?
In alpha-bat-ical order.
- How do bats know what’s to come in their future?
They read their horror-scope.
- What do bats have in common with dentures?
They both come out in the night.

- Why do bats hate living on their own?
They want to hang out with their friends.
- Who does the famous bat get letters from?
His fang club.
- What did the bat say to the girl he liked?
“Let’s hang out together some time.”
- Where do vampire bats go to take out a loan?
To the blood bank.
- What do bats say to vampires?
“You suck!”
- Why don’t people like grumpy vampires?
Because they have bat tempers.
- Why don’t vampires use the front door?
Because they use the bat flap instead.
- What does a vampire need for making breakfast in the morning?
Pancake batter.
- What’s a vampire bat’s favorite food?
I-scream!
- Why are vampire bats so unpopular?
Because they’re a massive pain in the neck.
- What’s a vampire bat’s favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
- What do little witches like to play at school?
Bats cradle.
- What is a vampire’s favorite sport?
Casketball.
- What do you say to a bat who’s just found a donor?
Coagulations.
- How does a vampire keep fit?
Batminton.
General Bat Puns & Wordplay

- Happy Halloween, Bat-ches.
- Had a fang-tastic costume this year.
- This was my costume, for Bat-ter or for worse.
- Am I into Halloween? You Bat I am.
- I’m a Bad Bat-ch.
- Sorry, I’m in a Bat mood today.
- Bat vibes only.
- Hey Jude, don’t make it Bat.
- Be nice to me or I’ll give you a nasty Bat-itude.
- Couldn’t com-Bat my urge to party.
- Came to Bat.
- Fang-girling over my costume this year.
- Out here Bat-tling for “Best Costume”.
- You Bat-ter have a great Halloween!
- Let me be your wingman (or wingwoman).
- If you liked it then you shoulda put a Wing on it.
- Wasn’t sure about my costume this Halloween so I decided to Wing it.
- Just Hanging around.
- What do you call a bat that works at the circus?
An acro-bat. - What do you call a bat that supports you?
A wing-man (or woman). - Why was the bat so grumpy?
It was having a Bat day. - What do you call it when two bats fight?